You are here

I ran four blocks today, 3 times, walking in between. I used to be a varsity cross country runner, able to run at least 10 miles, but I guess that was just a long time ago. Lately, I have been deciding in the evenings that I would run in the morning, and in the mornings deciding that it would really be better if I ran that evening. This has gone on for weeks. I finally concluded it would be a great accomplishment if I simply when outside and moved--that is literally what I told my siblings I was doing. And I did. I took that first step towards returning to fitness, because I acknowledged my place as a runner, that as of now I am not much of one (tomorrow I will go to my high school reunion and tell my former teammates that I ran four blocks, and then walked).

Every time we look at the map at a mall we search for the place we are going, find it, and then direct our eyes to the bold red dot: You are here. Skipping that step would make the map pointless, and we would get nowhere when we walked away. How important it is for us to be honest with ourselves when deciding what to do. I wasn't going outside to run, because I am always so frustrated that I am no longer the runner I was in high school. Well, I need exercise, so I need to run anyways.

I am writing this because I am fighting the urge to jump from the wrong position. Today I found that I was published in the Catholic Times--exciting right? I saw a copy of the paper at the library and found my name in print. It felt like nothing. I wanted to tell the librarian that I was published in their building, that I was a contributor to the words that circulated in and out of their hands--I refrained. I am grateful for this, that I have taken this step, that I have an article published that I like. People who do not know me are going to read it, but the interesting thing is how similar it is to that honest red dot, a landmark and a beginning, but also so far from the 8 or 10 short stories I am going to try to publish in a year, the ones I have not written yet. I can look at Joyce Carol Oates and wonder at the 95 books of hers the library holds and compare it to my 1 article in the paper, or I can see that an editor has deemed my work worth putting in his paper, for the first time. I am excited because I am in the library. I did not get paid for my writing, but someone did, which is an exciting start. In the meantime, please check out the article. I consider it an encouragement and a sign of successful efforts.